by Ilene Leshinsky
During the past two months, I experienced a convergence of events that had a tremendous impact on me as a woman.
But before I talk about that, let me introduce myself. My name is Ilene Leshinsky, and I am the founder of Find Body Freedom, the program I created for women who want to change their relationship with their bodies. If you’re a woman, you can probably relate to the insecurity we feel around body image and our relationship with food. If you’re a man, my guess is that you know one of these women.
I created Find Body Freedom because I struggled for the first half of my life, feeling bad about my body. Looking back, I recognize how I limited my participation in my own life because of how I felt about my body. For decades, even when I was “thin,” I carried the shame of being “fat.” So, I made it my mission to help other women and their daughters and granddaughters to find a way to love the bodies they’re in and to eat with joy. By the way, Women, these things are our birthrights!
So back to those events… In early July, PBS South Florida ran a two-part series, “The Vote,” which chronicled the history of how women in the US battled to win the right to vote from 1848 to 1919. Wow! It only took 71 years for the 19th Amendment to the Constitution to be ratified. (Catch my sarcasm?)
And then recently, I saw a trailer for a biopic of Helen Reddy that’s scheduled for release shortly. Newly married to husband #1, I was only 23 years old in 1971 when the song “I Am Woman” hit the airwaves. The words are as relevant now as they were then. I remember feeling that I had one foot in the 1950’s (Father Knows Best, Leave It to Beaver, my mother’s world) and the other foot in the culture shift of the 1960’s/1970’s. The first foot felt comfortable, “safe,” and the other felt dangerous and “liberating.”
“I am woman hear me roar, in numbers too big to ignore and I know too much to go back and pretend.” Those lyrics are a reminder of the many freedoms and opportunities we have now, that were only dreams in 1919. We’ve certainly come a long way, Baby!
So what does all of this have to do with Find Body Freedom?
It seems to me that we’re still caught in between two worlds—the one where we have unlimited potential and as Helen sings—we can do anything—and the one where we’re still trying to change who we are, our bodies, our personalities, our values and beliefs, to please others—and to be desirable and loved.
I’ve been working with women of all ages for the past 25 years. Many believed that if they could change their bodies they could change their lives. It goes something like this… If I had the perfect (or almost perfect) body, I’d be happy, have a better job, loving life partner or buy a bathing suit. Of course, we feel this way when daily we are bombarded with marketing messages that promise weight loss, body reshaping or the skin of a twelve-year old! So much time, so much energy spent in pursuit of changing our bodies!
Did you know that 97% of women have negative thoughts about their bodies daily? 95% of women (and men) who go on diets gain back the weight they lost? 81% of ten-year-old girls are afraid of getting fat? And over 10 million women and girls have life-threatening eating disorders?
So, it seems to me that we need another culture shift. Let’s put BOTH feet into taking care of our emotional and physical health. And with both feet, let’s take the leap of faith into creating a beautiful life, instead of focusing on a beautiful body.
Ilene Leshinsky is a clinical social worker and body image coach who works with women who want more joy and fulfillment in their lives. Her Find Body Freedom program is available to women of all ages who want to change their relationship with their bodies. Ilene can be reached at ileneleshinsky@gmail.com and at her website: www.findbodyfreedom.com.
Please view her interview with “She Owns It!” to learn more about Ilene at https://www.findbodyfreedom.com/post/press-she-owns-it-interviews-find-body-freedom-founder-ilene-leshinsky